How to handle people who don’t understand the entrepreneurial mindset
November 28, 2007
Here is a comment I addressed recently…
>I wish I could get my husband to have the outlook you have.
>He is locked into his job and sees no way out to become self sufficient.
To those of you who live with a spouse or children who don’t understand
the way you think or the way you are learning to think, hang in there. Be
thankful that you have a good spouse and don’t be tempted to compare him
or her to others. Be thankful for the way they are, no matter what it is and
look for the good things about them, not the apparent differences.
If you have a spouse that doesn’t understand your mindset, they may not
ever change because some folks are just not entrepreneurial in nature. But
also understand that they may not have been encouraged to be that way and
with a little education and encouragement, they may respond better than you
think they would.
Don’t be manipulative, but here are a few things you can do to offer
education and encouragement.
1. Get some motivational books and read them to the whole family.
2. Get some motivational books on tape (or CD) so the whole family
can listen to them even when you’re too busy to read.
3. Leave same cassette or CD in the CD player in the car.
4. Plan now to bring spouse and oldest kids to our next conference in
August. If you don’t think you can afford the trip, look for ways to earn
some extra money and start saving now so if he/she decides they’d like to attend
with you, money won’t be an excuse not to. (They will listen to others
better than to you about anything. I don’t know why that is but it seems to be a
universal principle.) ;)
5. Start doing something to earn money to demonstrate that there are ways
to make money besides getting it from somebody who already has it, such as
an employer. Try to create passive residual streams of income so you don’t have to
keep swapping your hours for dollars. Do it as school with the kids even if you
don’t homeschool so that school at your house is alive and meaningful. (There is
usually a certain amount of your time that you have to swap, especially initially.
Just choose wisely.)
6. Don’t be manipulative. Everyone has a direction to go and what works for me may not work
for you. You’ve got to find your own thing in life.
7. Read the History of Underground Education by Gatto to understand how
our educational system has programmed us to think, act and live as
employees. It hasn’t always been this way. The Industrial Revolution put a damper on
the entrepreneurial spirit of America. What worked for our parents’ generation
will not work for us Baby Boomers. The security offered by corporate and
government jobs are false and limiting. The only way to have true financial
security is to be in charge of your own finances and that means not only what you
spend and invest but how much you earn.
8. Encourage your children to think and take initiative for their own
lives and education instead of just blindly filling in the blanks and doing what they
are told. Yes, they should be respectful and behave and do what they are told. But
they should also learn to think and study to become leaders. When your children
start becoming entrepreneurs who take initiative and responsibility for
their future, your spouse will see the difference. The message is in the fruit.
That’s just a few thoughts off the top of my head.
So many books, so little time…
Rhea!
who understands the situation totally
Last 5 posts by Rhea Perry
- How Much Do You Invest in Your Education? - December 15th, 2008
- Joint Venturing with your Kids - December 11th, 2008
- Business is shifting from offline to online - December 5th, 2008
- Be Thankful for the Tragedies this Thanksgiving Day - November 27th, 2008
- It's Always Time to Be Thankful - November 21st, 2008
Awesome response to the question, Rhea. I think my husband has the entrepreneurial spirit, just not the self-discipline to make it happen. I KNOW he wants to come home, but sometimes acts as if he expects things to fall into his lap. It doesn’t work that way, but I don’t know how to encourage him without sounding like I’m nagging.
>>I think my husband has the entrepreneurial spirit, just not the self-discipline to make it happen.
That is essential! “Wanting to” and “doing it” are two different things. Not many folks really want to be tied down to a job. They just want the security of having that paycheck every week. They also may enjoy the routine.
But having your own small business means you have to have lots of education and lots of discipline to do what you have to do to make it all happen.
Unfortunately, in our country, traditional school doesn’t build that into our foundation. It builds in the concepts that create employees.
Do what you’re told.
Don’t ask questions.
Don’t think, just recite.
Whatever the teacher says is right.
Don’t work in groups, that’s cheating.
All those concepts don’t make for creating good business owners. So when you run across folks who can’t think out of the box, don’t blame them. They are just thinking like they were taught.
>> I KNOW he wants to come home, but sometimes acts as if he expects things to fall into his lap.
It won’t happen. You have to be pro-active.
So many people I know have a lottery mentality. They think if you become successful in life, that you were lucky. That’s not it.
Most overnight success stories took years to create. They plugged along day after day pursuing what they believed until they finally hit the tipping point and everything worked out.
Those are what you usually read about in magazine articles.
But having your own business isn’t as easy as it looks. It takes hard work, vision, education and consistency.
>>It doesn’t work that way, but I don’t know how to encourage him without sounding like I’m nagging.
I’d pray and leave it to God. Then I would figure out how I could do something for myself. He may not always be there to provide for you and now that the Internet has come into being, it’s much easier for a stay-at-home mom to earn an income and still keep up with the house and kids than ever before in history.
Just like in marriage, don’t focus on your spouse, focus on yourself.